when robert and i adopted our first child, we knew god was calling us to more than just a single adoption-- he was calling us to surrender visions we'd once had of our family, make this the default way we'd add more little lewises to our home, and be joyful voices that said: adoption doesn't have to be a "plan b, lesser option"!
and so after a few recent months of clarifying prayer, we decided it was time to do this domestic infant adoption fun again! [domestic because we have a heart for the children + families right here in the states around us, and infant because we'd like to keep our son the oldest child... and he just isn't old enough to adopt much beyond a little one right now.]
and because nearly 40% of american adults consider adoption but only 3% actually do it, we want to be as open with our process as possible. we know the experience can be intimidating, expensive, and heartbreaking... but we also know it is full of abundant available information, god's provision, and so (so!) much joy.
if you're curious about the process or are considering an adoption, here's a little bit of info for you:
we ended up getting connected to our first son through a family friend, but our original plan was to use faithful adoption consultants, and so that's the path we're going to begin on again. a consultant group isn't an actual adoption agency (meaning they don't work firsthand with birthmothers/ connecting families); instead, they work as a middle man between multiple agencies and the adoptive parents (us!). and because of that, in short, the chances of getting matched with a birthmother quickly are much higher. currently, our consultant group has a 4.5 month average wait time! there is a common myth that says you'll wait 2+ years before your bring a child home, and it just doesn't have to be that way... especially if you're okay adopting a child of any race.
so step O N E for anyone considering adoption is to find the agency/ consultant group you want to work with. we chose f.a.c. because of a friend's recommendation, which is an excellent way to narrow down your options. ask around and then look into the groups you've heard about; most agencies have monthly meetings you can attend as a free and honest place to just ask questions + gather information. we went to one of these for bethany (which is a great option, too!)
once you choose, your agency/ group will tell you what step T W O is, but it's usually a home study. some agencies do the home study themselves and some ask you to find your own social worker to do that step. if that's where you land (like us), a simple google search will lead you in the right direction. we chose adoption assistance because they had the lowest fees we could find around here :) i'd estimate a home study costing between 1-2k on average?
we're currently working on our home study, which isn't nearly as intimidating as tv makes it seem. it's mostly papers to sign, documents to make copies of (license, marriage certificate, etc), and basic actions to take (get fingerprinted, have a medical checkup, etc). when those steps are completed, someone will come into our home to confirm it's a physically decent place to bring a child into (like, no meth cooking or anything) and then ask some questions that just confirm we're in a healthy mental shape to bring a child home, too.
and that's where we're at now-- i'll be sure to keep you updated along the way! xo